I've reached a point in my life where I don't know what's next. I graduated from College last May, took one semester off, and am now completing my Teaching Credential with Student Teaching. I have 5 weeks left of Student Teaching, and then I will officially be a California Credentialed Teacher! I've waited so long for this, however the truth is most Public Schools in California are probably not hiring new teachers in the fall due to Budget cuts and so forth. I always thought I'd finish College, get married, get a Teaching Job right away, and so forth. Clearly, God has shown me He has a different plan for me. Only one of the above has happened thus far, and it wasn't even in my timing. lol. I graduated from College one year later than I hoped, and took one semester off of school to go to Africa, completing my credential and school in a total of 6 years. I obviously am not married and not even close, so that's out of my will. And, the teaching situation for the job does not look so hot at this point. However, when you are Pursuing Him, His purpose and plan will prevail, regardless of the circumstances. I know of two three people who were basically handed jobs. One woman in particular received her dream job in a time where there were many applying and she didn't think she'd get the position because she was fresh out of College. However, God had a plan for her and He did what it took to get her that job. It definitely is a rollercoaster ride though. Some days, I completely trust God's plan and I know He knows what is next for me. Other days, I think about the competition to get in, how it is literally impossible with the circumstances, and I question if I even want to teach in Public School.
Something I've found interesting is my lack of motivation to complete a Resume, Cover Letter, and call schools and apply for jobs, if there are any. I haven't even been on EdJoin (a website with job postings for teachers) and didn't even finish creating/updating my account on Edjoin. How can I expect to get a job when I'm not even prepared with the appropriate paperwork done? I drive past Horizon Prep M-F on my way to work, and I always think about contacting them to see if they have any job openings for the fall, yet I don't get around to actually doing it. I think to myself, maybe Substitute teaching won't be so bad afterall because it is more flexible and maybe God knows I'm not ready to be teaching full time yet for some reason. He does know me better than I know myself, so whatever He has next for me is going to be BEST for me. I just need to constantly remind myself of that. If you're a Christian, you know what I'm talking about. It's hard to give up our lives and follow Him, to let go of our plans and be open to His. We like to be in control and always know what is next, so when we aren't in control and are uncertain of what is next, we get frustrated. (At least that's how it is for me)
All that being said, Africa sure has been on my mind a lot lately. I can't wait to go back. I watched a video of a woman who stayed at the Orphanage I'll be staying at and I love it. The kids are adorable. I have a huge heart for Africa, and would love to possibly teach there or even just help out at an Orphanage. I'm keeping my options open by thinking of staying longer than my team when I go to Ghana in June, applying for Teaching jobs in Africa that are given to me, here or there and praying a lot. Ultimately, I need to remember that God knows what He's up to. :) He has a plan for me. Jeremiah 29:11 says "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord". I'll be communicating with someone who has been to the Orphanage I'll be going to in June and she will be joining our team as well (She teaches in Minnesota and has been to the Orphanage in Ghana and helped out there in the past, a few times) and seeing what my options are in regards to staying there if they need a helping hand. I emailed someone who my sister gave me info for about Teaching at a Christian School in Malawi, Africa for the 2011-2012 year. I am getting contact info for a Principal at a school in South Africa who may be in need of Teachers in the fall and will be emailing him soon. God is opening National doors it appears, and I'm going to be open to whatever it is He opens and let Him lead me and pave the way.
During the times that I've been discouraged about what's next, I turn to a page in my journal where God spoke to me through worship one night. He said:
Katie, stop thinking so much about others. What I call you to do is not for everybody and not everybody will understand or support you in it. But, I will provide you with everything that you need. Do you trust me? I will provide your needs if I open the door for you to stay in Ghana longer than 2 weeks. Don't try to figure that out now. Just trust me to work it out. Stop trying to figure out what I've got next for you. I know the desires of your heart and I will give you them. You have to rely on me daily though. Stop worrying about your future...it's in my hands. Just be willing and open and I'll take care of the rest.
Wow, how can I argue with that? It would be like slapping God in the face if I ignore all of this. I'm so thankful He gave me this word and I find it so encouraging when I catch myself trying to figure out what's next and worrying about my future. In the meantime, it is my job to simply obey and pursue Him. It's about time I jump on board for this adventure and be excited about what is next in my life, because whatever it is, it will be great since God is leading me and I'm open to His ways.
Monday, April 4, 2011
Just over 2 months; Just over 10 weeks; 73days; each one way to describe the amount of time I have left before I'm Ghana Bound. I know it will come quick! I still can't believe I'm going back to Africa, especially this soon. I honestly can't even fathom it sometimes because I had no desire to go back for a long time after my last trip...until God transformed my heart! I am completely confident God wants me on this team for two main reasons: 1. He provided me with more money than the deposit amount, showing He will provide the funds for the entire trip. 2. He redirected my team's destination from Mozambique to Ghana, where we will be working at an Orphanage...which is right up my alley!
When I think about Africa, I smile really big. How could I not? Look how stinkin' cute this boy is?!? :)
As I think about Africa daily and prepare to go to Ghana in a couple of months, there is a lot on my mind.